No matter what side you're on,

you're a complete idiot.

For starters, the Republicans. They think the solution to everything is making poor people pay more money and load big businesses with tax breaks and other trinkets.

Then, the Democrats. "Save the world! Take from the rich businesses and high-rollin' taxpayers! They just save their money and don't spend it on anything, anyway! It's the poor people that need the tax breaks!"

Guess what, either-winged party people? We're screwed either way!!

For the proud Democrats, taking money away from big businesses will ruin this economy very slowly. You claim they don't need the "big jets." I don't think so either. But, when those planes are no longer being created, what happens to the people who build the planes? Paint them? Screw in the tiny screws? Make the seat covers? What about the people who feed the animals that get skinned so the white-collared friends with pressed pants can sit on their freshly manufactured sheddings? Wait... those are the blue-collar workers... the ones that wouldn't have jobs if there weren't insane amounts of money being spent on planes...

And Republicans? No one likes you... But -- alas -- I digress. You think that the poor people should keep paying taxes and the rich snobs should keep their riches. Well, that's great and all, but that doesn't cut anything out of a budget to get us back on track...

I think a huge issue is that people can't even begin to imagine fourteen trillion dollars. That's $14,000,000,000,000.00, friends. Most of us have some form of debt that looms over us; credit cards, student loans, Nordstrom Rack, whathaveyou. But $14,000,000,000,000.00? Yeah... We'll never see that in our lifetimes! I have a credit card with a $600.00 balance that costs me $10 a month in interest. Can you imagine the interest (each month) that $14 trillion accrues?! Proportions tell me around $233,333,333,333... just shy of a quarter of a billion dollars... each month. And to say we don't have the budget for school funding, or wildlife preservation (Alaska...) makes complete sense! We can't even afford to pay our interest back!

I don't claim to have a win-win, know-it-all solution, but I can say this: Whatever the debt resolution is, it needs to be a long-term repayment plan that gets revised at least yearly, or this economy is going to get way worse.

Dear Government,

Please stop borrowing.

Sincerely yours,

America.

Your mileage may vary. See store for details.

Powered by Solar Power.

So, I just got back from a trip to Tennessee and couldn't help but have some intellectual thoughts with a special someone along the way.

What if... Every mile of the 600+ highway we traveled was covered with solar panels, generating free and sustainable energy? Panels covered by a translucent material that would not only support the weigh of vehicles traveling, but would also be more durable when faced with ice and snow, reducing the amount of preventative and repair costs associated with potholes, repaving, and upkeep? These solar panels would  harvest energy that could offset supplemental city power needs, or completely power highway lights that illuminate the roads.

What if... Every one of the 1000+ semi trucks we passed had solar panels on the tops of them, generating free and sustainable energy? Theoretically, we could make solar powered trucks that wouldn't need to rely on diesel power as much.

Sure, the initial investment here would be huge, but as the technology became more widespread, it would become cheaper and more efficient. What I don't think most digest is this simple fact: solar power is free. There are houses that pull from mother nature and actually create an energy deficit and sell their excess power back to the power companies and making a profit.

I have a solar phone charger that isn't bigger than a credit card. The little guy generates 5v and 1A, which is enough to charge my smartphone for free whenever I need it.

On a large scale, the possibilities are near endless. Imagine a solar cell set over 10 miles long and what it could power... I just wish someone with the know how (and the money) would take a risk and change our world forever.

Your mileage may vary.

...Severe and irreversible damage to both my brain and nervous system...

So, apparently there's this vitamin called "B-12" that, as Wikipedia promises with its ever-knowing wisdom, plays a "key role in the normal functioning of the brain and nervous system."

The cute little guy looks like this:

Isn't it ADORABLE?!

Well, I went and got a CBC done (complete blood count) at my local family-friendly doctor. The accepted levels for B-12 in your blood are 200 - 1100 mcg. Anything below 500 is considered non-beneficial and detrimental to "normal" functioning. My level is 310 which, my doctor notions, explains all of my anxiety, anger, and overall bitchiness over the past few months. So, his solution is for me to intake 2,000 mcg of this jazz daily for three weeks, get re-tested, and then likely get shots daily until my levels breach the 500+ mark. The most plentiful food (containing a mere 83 mcg/100g of food) is panfried beef liver... needless to say, I bought me some pills.

Per Wikipedia, "Vitamin B₁₂ deficiency can also cause symptoms of mania and psychosis," which may explain the voices I've been talking with nightly for the last three months... joke. Sort of. Maybe. Only not really. But seriously. Kinda.

But forreal. Why hasn't anyone caught this before?! "Vitamin B₁₂ deficiency can potentially cause severe and irreversible damage, especially to the brain and nervous system. At levels only slightly lower than normal, a range of symptoms such as fatigue, depression, and poor memory may be experienced." Yep, that's me lately.

To make a long story short, in due time, I may no longer be funny or be bitchy, but I will be avoiding severe and irreversible damage to both my brain and nervous system. Way to go body. Way to set yourself for failure...

60 pills of 2,000mcg B-12? $9.99
Avoiding severe and irreversible damage to both my brain and nervous system? Priceless.

Your mileage may vary.

-j

I have a mild phobia

of insects. Like many, I really don't like spiders. Like some, I don't like things that crawl. Like few, I have vivid dreams that I am laying in bed and bugs are crawling all over me.

A few weeks ago, I woke up with an ant crawling on my leg and instantly found myself in a manic fit. I'm thankful I was alone, or I probably would've ended up in an asylum.

Today's Do-It-Yourself topic is fumigation or, non-professionally, "fogging."

I decided, after taking my sheets off to wash them and finding a dead bug on my mattress pad, that it was time to take action. So, I went to K-Mart (ew. ew. ew.) and bought a three pack of "Hot Shot Bedbug & Flea Fogger" for $9.99. I opted for this over the others because, in all honesty, this was the cheapest and I had found a bug in my bed. Was it a BED BUG? Nah. It was just some nasty little bugger. The house I live in isn't a dump -- it's a classic, bungalow style older home with, I'm sure, plenty of cracks and crevices for little bugs to crawl in and out. Too, it's been hot out, which means the bugs want some of my precious air conditioning.

Now, this stuff has some crazy stuff in it. As far as "active ingredients" go: pyrethrins, cyano-4-chloro-alpha-bezeneacetate, N-Octyl bicycloheptene dicaroximide, and 2-1-Methyl-2-4-phenoxypheonxy ethoxy pyridine. There are probably some typos so please, don't quote me on that. Either way, heavy stuff.

Here's the process:

• Close all windows and vents.
• Turn off any airconditioning.
• Unplug all electronic devices (this stuff is flammable and even the Air Wick on a timer could blow yo' stuff out 'da roof). Don't forget the lights!
• Cover fish tanks.
• Remove all food from the room. This stuff will settle. 
• Open closets, drawers, etc. 
• Set one canister in the center of the room. Make sure it's a stable surface. Only use ONE canister per room.
• Shake the canister vigorously.
• Open the top and hold the can at arms' length. Firmly press down with your thumb (pointing it away from you, idiot...) and let the can down.
• Run! Just kidding. Just leave the room and shut the door. 
• We've got cats here, so I made sure that I toweled under the door (like the pot heads do in dorms...) just to be safe.
• Wait two hours.
• Go in the room and open any windows.
• Leave the room.
• Come back in 45 minutes and take a breath. If you can smell chemicals, leave and let it air out some more. A fan in the window helps...
• Wash any exposed clothes. This stuff is toxic, and you don't want the settled remains on your body all day.

After I was done, I came back to a plethora of dead bugs... just one spider, about 10 ants, a few beetles (like the small one I saw in my bed) and, overall, I was VERY impressed.

Just some food for thought.

Three cans of fogger? $9.99
Now dead bugs that you were scared of? Awesome.
Peace of mind? Priceless.

Your mileage may vary.

The Wonders of Slow Cooking

Brief Background:

I work long hours at work. I also work second shift, which is 3p-11p. So, naturally, I leave home around 2p, arrive a few minutes early, and often have to stay late because things just don't go right. Half the time I don't take full hour dinner breaks, and when I actually take time, I hit up some form of Panda Express or soup kitchen. I'm generally hungry when I get back and at midnight, one does not usually feel like cooking anything.

Well, that all changed when I decided to buy a Crock Pot.

Today's Money Saving Tip? I made my first pot roast and, for anyone interested, here's how I did it. 

Ingredients Required:

• Crock Pot ($14.98 at Walmart, which lasts YEARS)
• 1.25 lbs of pot roast ($8) or 1.25 lbs of rump roast ($3.50)
• One can of condensed cream of mushroom soup ($0.99)
• 0.5oz of dried onion soup mix (optional), comes in 1oz packets, four to a box. ($2.49 for a box of four 1oz packets)
• Frozen vegetables (again, optional, but they're really good) ($1.99 for a large bag, 2 recipes)
• 1.5 cups of water (something like $0.005/gallon) 

Servings:

• For me? 3ish. If I'm really hungry? 2.

Average Price per Serving:

• Cheap. Around $1.93

Notes before we start:

• With the water, I measured it with dry measuring cups, so take that into consideration if you're anal-retentive. 
• The Crock Pot says that its important to have the Crock Pot at least half full, so be sure to adjust your recipe accordingly.

How To:

• Dump the water, soup, dry soup mix, and vegetables in the Crock Pot.
• Stir until the condensed soup doesn't look like a blob of fat tissue.
• Trim any fat off of the roast. Seriously, don't eat that crap.
• Rinse off the roast. E. Coli is dangerous, I hear.
• Put the chunk of meat in the middle of the nasty looking crap. Cover it completely with said mixture.
• Turn Crock Pot on LOW setting, cover with lid, and let it sit there for a good 10 hours.

Finally:

• Eat. It's delicious and makes its own gravy. 1.25 pounds is enough meat to fill me up and give me two Zip Lock containers for work. Leave them in the fridge after cooling and consume before it tastes bad. 

Panda Express Dinner: $8.35 with drink
Crock Pot Dinner: $2.50 with  drink (see drink money saving tips here!)

Average Savings: $5.85/meal = $58.50 after 10 meals.

Your mileage may vary.